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Author: Subject: Question for the drinkers and reformed drinkers

Zen Peach





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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 08:36 AM
I had an episode this weekend that has me questioning whether I have a drinking problem or just an occasional self control problem. I go for days and don't drink. Then I have an occasion like Saturday where I got hammered on tequila and beer, rode my motorcycle home totally blacked out, and dropped the bike in my driveway. I got home by the grace of God, I am sure of that. Now, I'm wondering why I do what I do and what my next move is. Do I quit drinking? Do I quit drinking tequila? Do I take an extended ride on the wagon and drink beer only on special occasions? I don't drink a lot at home, just when I'm socializing. I feel like this is more of a self control issue than it is an alcohol dependence issue. I just don't seem to know when to say when sometimes. I'd appreciate any input, especially from those of you who have been in these shoes. Thanks. I'm lucky, and glad, to be alive.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 08:48 AM
i am glad nobody got hurt...

 

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Universal Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:04 AM
If you have to ask the question you already know the answer...

 

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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:06 AM
quote:
i am glad nobody got hurt...
I echo that.
I'm a safe enough distance from you Big Dave to tell you that was pretty dumb though, and please don't do that again, OK?
Just the fact your posting this is a cry out...and you must listen.
"Between the two witnesses, listen to your conscious"
Good luck Dave, we love you man!

 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:06 AM
Dave ... I am very glad you are alive ... and also glad that you didn't hurt anyone else!

I tend to have a drink most days, but only a couple of beers just by way of relaxing at the end of the day. At weekends I tend to drink more, but most of the time I manage to keep control and rarely go over the top. Sometimes at a party I admit I might not be quite so self controlled ... but rule number one for me is that if I am going to have anything to drink at all is that I do not drive.

If you are worried about whether your drinking is getting out of control but youstill want to try to drink for social purposes, then try sticking to beer. You will still get drunk, but generally there is only so much volume you can drink. It is all to easy for it to get out of hand with Tequila, Whiskey or whatever.

Bottom line though is that if you are going out to socialise and think you might have a drink ... leave the bike at home.

All the best mate!

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:11 AM
BDOB, Be careful brother. Check your pm's.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:12 AM
quote:
If you have to ask the question you already know the answer...
Thanks Sharon, but I'm not looking for cliches, I'm looking for honest answers and opinions from people who have been in this situation already. If anyone would rather answer me by PM, I'll keep it in the strictest confidence.

 

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Universal Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:21 AM
Sorry if you felt that's what it was Dave but yes I have been in that situation and if you have blackouts you have a problem, and that's how I found out that I had a drinking problem; I found out that folks that don't have a drinking problem don't spend time asking themselves this question...

 

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Universal Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:26 AM
Dave, glad you are OK this time thru. i quit drinking in 1985 and glad I did. Don't know if you are an alcoholic or not, but if ya think you have a problem you probably do. No judgement, just concern for a solid brudda, I am always here if ya would like to privaely converse.

Neil

 

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Ultimate Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:49 AM
quote:
quote:
If you have to ask the question you already know the answer...
Thanks Sharon, but I'm not looking for cliches, I'm looking for honest answers and opinions from people who have been in this situation already. If anyone would rather answer me by PM, I'll keep it in the strictest confidence.


Dave,
I have to agree with Sharon and Neil, and obviously thier blunt answers are simply out of concern for you. There are plenty of people and resources out there that can help you make an honest and accurate assessment of your situation. Glad you, and everyone else on the road, are ok!

Rhonda

 

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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 09:55 AM
Dave,

I drink alot and love it. I have the same problem if I drink I drink to get drunk. So I do not drink on work nights. Its like a potatoe chip you can't have just one.!!! Ive hugged a few guard railes in my day.

 

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Peach Extraordinaire



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:08 AM
It's called binge drinking. Up here in Wisconsin it's considered a huge issue among college students and the general population for that matter. I don't have any answers regarding whether you have a drinking problem since I am guilty of it on numerous occasions also. But maybe you should try to pre-arrange a designated driver prior to going out and leave the bike at home, that's what I do. (I also am very glad no one was hurt).

[Edited on 12/3/2007 by Peachypetewi]

 

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World Class Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:19 AM
Dave, I have heard the average drunk driver gets away with it 228 times before they are caught. I am pretty sure that I am around 226. So that's kept me from doing it for about ten years now.

Do you have a family history of alcohol dependency and/ or accompanying forms of abuse (physical/ verbal/ etc?)

I drink a bit with my wife at home. We have recently ended some of our friendships with social drinkers who made us feel we were getting in uncomfortable siutations time & time again while in their company.

It sounds to me like you may be ready for a few changes too.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:24 AM
quote:
I drink alot and love it. I have the same problem if I drink I drink to get drunk.


I'm glad I'm not the only one but it has been ten days since my last drink. I had to make a hard decision to stop continuing at the rate I was going. I don't know for how long I'll hold out but hope to have better control from now on.

As an old friend used to tell me "pace ya'self big boy". The party is always a marathon at a sprinters pace with me, going from 0 to drunk in no time.

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:39 AM
BDOB, glad you're ok. I joke w/ my friends sometimes, "want some free legal advice? Don't drink and drive." Getting a DUI in this state used to be pretty minor, plea nolo and pay a few hundred bucks; now, it's much more serious. Again, take care.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:42 AM
Thanks for all your responses. I appreciate the candor.

I think I am more of a binge drinker. Like I said, I can go for days and not want nor drink anything. I have always been partial to beer, and I can hold my own with it. But every time I drink tequila, I eff up. So I can safely say I am swearing off tequila from now on.

Brian, 228 times? I know I am WAY passed that. I've been partying for a LONG time now, and I know I've been tempting fate a little too much here lately. I playfully tell my friends, "I may grow old, but I refuse to grow up." Well, it's not funny anymore. It's time for me to act right.

As Clint Eastwood would say, "A man's gotta know his limits."

 

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Universal Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:45 AM
Dave,

Only you can answer your questions. I (or anybody else) can tell you what we "think", but then again we don't "walk in your shoes". You need to take some time and look at the "big picture" of the "when and whys" when you DO drink to much, and if there might be some "issues" in your life that might be fueling this drinking. If you do that then I belive the "answers" will come to you. Now it might not be the "answers" you want to hear, but you know it'll be the "true one" if you're completely honest with yourself, and hopefully you can make whatever decisions necessary based on those "answers".

Myself, I do enjoy a few "cold ones" in the evening, and sometimes, like you, on various social occasions I may end up drinking a "few more" than I need. One piece of advice I will give you, if you think you're going to be in situation where you might get "hammered", then either plan on "staying the night" or else "have somebody sober" drive you home. It ain't worth getting a DUI, and you certainly don't want to put yourself in a situation where "something more serious" could happen.

 
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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 10:57 AM
Hey Dave,
Been down the same road as you many times before. I know you are looking for answers... but the truth is No-One can tell you if you have a drinking problem or you are an alcoholic... Only you can tell yourself that! I know because people told me for years I had a problem & I didn't listen, the way I solved that was to stay away from those people. It was only when I figured out on my own that my drinking was a problem that I decied to do something about it. That was over 22 years ago & I have'nt had a drink since. But I had to make that choice, Nobody could make it for me. A quick story.. I met a guy the other day who has been clean & sober for 7 years, but he still lives the misery of his drinking everyday. Because the last night he drank he killed someone drunk driviing. I am lucky enough to be here today & not have to live with that demon. It very easily could have been me driving that car that killed that person. Just look with in yourself Dave & if you truly want to you will find the answers you are looking for. If I could figure it out anyone can. Best of luck to you Brother & remember you don't ever have to feel this way again if you choose not to! I'd love to talk more with you if you want to pm me that would be awesome! By the way... Your Fairy God-Mother sent me!
Peace Brother, Vinnie

[Edited on 12/3/2007 by vinnied6]

 

Universal Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:04 AM
Dave, one suggestion, cabfare then.

 

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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:04 AM
Hey Dan
Congrats... 10 days with out a drink may not seem like alot to some people...but to others its an eternity! Keep up the good work!
Vinnie

 

World Class Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:06 AM
I gave up Scotch many moons ago ( my to-kill-ya )
it no doubt saved my life doing so.

I enjoy good beer like good food.... slowly and in moderation,
especially when Good Live Music and Good Time Feelings come around.
like medicine, it needs to be titrated properly... Do Not Over-medicate !

Drinking excessively, especially when one is depressed or grieving is a recipe for diaster.

Do I practice what I preach?
I try to... 100% of the time,
I succeed maybe 90%

Cliche' of the moment...
moderation is the key,
In anything we do.

Be Safe, heaven has enough bass players...

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:07 AM
Thanks Fred and Vinnie.

My immediate plan is to quit tequila entirely. I'm not drinking ANYTHING until the Hayseed Christmas Party, and then I'm going to watch my P's & Q's pretty closely. I think I'll be OK until then.

 

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World Class Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:21 AM
Hey Dave, I'll echo the rest of the crowd here & say I'm glad to hear you're alright.

And what I wrote was "the average" drunk driver gets away with it 228 times. My last occurence was looking in to a cop's flashlight less than a mile away (after driving about thrity miles) from home telling him what I had been doing that evening- and driving on with a speeding ticket & a very important lesson learned.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:52 AM
I am glad you made it back to the driveway without any fatalities.
Hows your bike... and your driveway ?

 

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If we practice and eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, soon the whole world will be blind and toothless. -Mahatma Gandhi.

 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/3/2007 at 11:59 AM
Significantly scuffed the paint on the right saddle bag, scuffed the rubber gasket between the inner and outer fairing (the black leather cover saved the paint on the outer fairing,) scratched the chrome on the right side engine guard. I'm not very pleased with myself. The bike didn't deserve it. The driveway is fine.

 

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