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Author: Subject: Investment Tips

World Class Peach





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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 07:57 AM
Investment tips for 2008 & 2009
With all the turmoil in the market today and the collapse of Lehman Bros and Acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks.

Watch for these consolidations in later this year:

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become:
Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become:
Poly, Warner, Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:
MMMGood.

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become:
ZipAudiDoDa ...

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become:
FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become:
Knott NOW!

9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name:
Titty Titty Bang Bang

And finally...

10. Mother's Jams & Jellies and Smucker's Jams & Jellies will unite to be:
Mother Smucker's

 

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World Class Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 08:57 AM
Hey Barb,
Thanks for the advice...Where do I invest??? I must have at least $1.38 left......

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 09:11 AM
Currently using all my stock certificates as toilet paper. That way, at least they're worth $hit.

 

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Peach Pro



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 09:24 AM


LOL - Thanks for making my Friday morning. I hear the market is tanking again.

Peace,
Jim

 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 09:32 AM
ROFL!!! Thanks for the laugh, Barb. I really needed it.

 

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Ultimate Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 09:49 AM
quote:
Currently using all my stock certificates as toilet paper. That way, at least they're worth $hit.



NICE Rusty! sad but true,

nice list Barb, thanks for the needed LOL!

[Edited on 10/10/2008 by peachygurl]

 

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It's better than sunshine,
It's better than moonshine,
Damn sure better than rain.

 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 09:49 AM
LMAO!!! Thanks so much for the laugh, Barb! Just looked at my 401K so this was much needed!

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 10:05 AM
quote:
quote:
Currently using all my stock certificates as toilet paper. That way, at least they're worth $hit.



NICE Rusty! sad but true,

nice list Barb, thanks for the needed LOL!

[Edited on 10/10/2008 by peachygurl]


,,,,and speaking of that...

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,434043,00.html

 

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If we practice and eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth, soon the whole world will be blind and toothless. -Mahatma Gandhi.

 

Extreme Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 10:28 AM
Thanks for the inside scoop Barb! Made me laugh.

Mitch

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 10:44 AM
I'm calling my broker now to keep an eye out for these mergers.

 

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Quit!

 

Extreme Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 10:58 AM
I can't find me broker----- but when I do -- I'll @#$%&&* him

 

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beaconbro

 

Extreme Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 03:13 PM
Great stuff! Thanks. I'll pass it on and let everybody in on the action.

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 10/10/2008 at 03:15 PM
"Broker. I can't get over the irony of that word!"

- a line I heard in a movie or television show or something recently.

 

____________________
Music is love, and love is music, if you know what I mean.
People who believe in music are the happiest people I've ever seen.

Bill Ector, Randy Stephens, Dan Hills and a guy named BobO who I never met - Forever in my heart!

 
 


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