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Author: Subject: Broccoli Problems

True Peach





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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:11 PM
I like broccoli well enough when cooked as a side dish. It's not my favorite, but I'll eat it. I'll even eat it raw with dip if it's on a vegetable tray at a party. But I don't like it in a lettuce salad. Don't like it that way at all.

So the problem started when my wife served up a salad at dinner a few weeks ago, and she put broccoli in the salad. I should have told her I didn't like broccoli in my salad, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings so I didn't say anything. Instead, I ate all the broccoli first so that I could enjoy the rest of the salad broccoli free. Noticing that I went straight for the broccoli, she figured I really loved it. So the next time we had salad she put even more broccoli in it. I didn't know what to do, so once again I ate it first just to get rid of it. Well, this happened a couple more times since, and now it's to the point where I get a bowl of broccoli, with a little lettuce in it, at every meal. I can't say anything at this point or I'll look like a jerk, and if I eat one more piece of broccoli I think I'll puke. I don't know what to do. I had to tell somebody. Thanks for listening.

 
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Extreme Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:15 PM
Tell her.
 

True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:25 PM
This reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry is hiding mouthfuls of half-chewed meat in the pocket of his jacket.

Bob 1954's 115th Dream:


 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:43 PM
quote:
This reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry is hiding mouthfuls of half-chewed meat in the pocket of his jacket.

Yes! He wraps the mutton in Grandma Mima's napkins and stuff's them in his coat. Then Elaine borrows the coat and is chased by dogs all the way home. I don't want this to get that bad. I'm thinking I might put a little green food coloring in the toilet and tell my wife that I think broccoli causes me intestinal issues. Maybe try to get a note from the doctor or something.

 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:47 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:49 PM
Maybe after a broccoli-intensive evening . . . you pull the covers over her head once or twice.

She might just reduce the household broccoli supply of her own accord.

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 09:55 PM
Go to restaurant w/ salad bar. Make sure wife sees you reach for the broccoli, then take none. On inquiry, tell wife you just decided you don't like broccoli on salad anymore. They change their mind all the time, so she'll never think twice about it.
 

Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:05 PM
HAHAHAHA!!! LMAO!!!

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:10 PM
well you will release ummmm...err...odors...

that should do it..

there are, however MASSIVE health benefits to eating it

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:15 PM

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:17 PM
quote:
I like broccoli well enough when cooked as a side dish. It's not my favorite, but I'll eat it. I'll even eat it raw with dip if it's on a vegetable tray at a party. But I don't like it in a lettuce salad. Don't like it that way at all.

So the problem started when my wife served up a salad at dinner a few weeks ago, and she put broccoli in the salad. I should have told her I didn't like broccoli in my salad, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings so I didn't say anything. Instead, I ate all the broccoli first so that I could enjoy the rest of the salad broccoli free. Noticing that I went straight for the broccoli, she figured I really loved it. So the next time we had salad she put even more broccoli in it. I didn't know what to do, so once again I ate it first just to get rid of it. Well, this happened a couple more times since, and now it's to the point where I get a bowl of broccoli, with a little lettuce in it, at every meal. I can't say anything at this point or I'll look like a jerk, and if I eat one more piece of broccoli I think I'll puke. I don't know what to do. I had to tell somebody. Thanks for listening.


What we have here is a failure to communicate.

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:22 PM
LMFAO!!!!!!ROTF!!!!!!!!!LMFAOSM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!BwaaaaaaaaaaHaaa aaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!



I don't think any story I've heard here made me laugh that hard!!! I think I busted a rib!

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:25 PM
quote:
Go to restaurant w/ salad bar. Make sure wife sees you reach for the broccoli, then take none. On inquiry, tell wife you just decided you don't like broccoli on salad anymore. They change their mind all the time, so she'll never think twice about it.

I like it, Brock. I'm going with this as Plan A. I'll let you know.

 

Extreme Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:25 PM
God this is funny. Just tell her............your married and if you hurt her feelings it is all part of the marital process. we all make some sacrifices and compromise. She will laugh at you for not telling her sooner. She might even call you a dumb ass while she laughs. Something like this "Well dumbass, you should have told me sooner"... or "Well what are your thoughts on Brussell Sprouts"..

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 10:36 PM
Run for president:

I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat
it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli.
George H. W. Bush

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 11:16 PM
I never ate it as a kid.

I like it, have it once every other week.

 

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Peach Extraordinaire



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  posted on 12/15/2009 at 11:50 PM
quote:
God this is funny. Just tell her............your married and if you hurt her feelings it is all part of the marital process. we all make some sacrifices and compromise. She will laugh at you for not telling her sooner. She might even call you a dumb ass while she laughs. Something like this "Well dumbass, you should have told me sooner"... or "Well what are your thoughts on Brussell Sprouts"..



I like this answer the best . . . I would have thought you liked it and would have given you more also in the next salad. Speak up man !

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 02:35 AM
quote:
quote:
God this is funny. Just tell her............your married and if you hurt her feelings it is all part of the marital process. we all make some sacrifices and compromise. She will laugh at you for not telling her sooner. She might even call you a dumb ass while she laughs. Something like this "Well dumbass, you should have told me sooner"... or "Well what are your thoughts on Brussell Sprouts"..



I like this answer the best . . . I would have thought you liked it and would have given you more also in the next salad. Speak up man !

OK, if the salad bar trick doesn't work I will.

 

Extreme Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 06:25 AM
Dear Abbey,
quote:
I like broccoli well enough when cooked as a side dish. It's not my favorite, but I'll eat it. I'll even eat it raw with dip if it's on a vegetable tray at a party. But I don't like it in a lettuce salad. Don't like it that way at all.

So the problem started when my wife served up a salad at dinner a few weeks ago, and she put broccoli in the salad. I should have told her I didn't like broccoli in my salad, but I didn't want to hurt her feelings so I didn't say anything. Instead, I ate all the broccoli first so that I could enjoy the rest of the salad broccoli free. Noticing that I went straight for the broccoli, she figured I really loved it. So the next time we had salad she put even more broccoli in it. I didn't know what to do, so once again I ate it first just to get rid of it. Well, this happened a couple more times since, and now it's to the point where I get a bowl of broccoli, with a little lettuce in it, at every meal. I can't say anything at this point or I'll look like a jerk, and if I eat one more piece of broccoli I think I'll puke. I don't know what to do. I had to tell somebody. Thanks for listening.
"Rhymes with Cob"

Hahahaha!! I'm sorry, that is some funny writing there.

It *always* helps to "write things down" .... when ya have something on your mind. Well, you've done that!

I bet if you print that out verbatim, and if there's some moment when she's in a good mood (bring her coffee in bed or something) ------ say, "Honey, you have to hear what this nutter wrote to Dear Abbey!" and proceed to read it to her.

Good luck - of course you'll have to improvise. But what you have there above -- the truth --- is Golden!


Peace.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 06:34 AM
This is so funny and cute! I would tell her just like you wrote. I know if it was me and you finally told me I would think you were pretty great for eating it even though you weren't crazy about it and the fact that you didn't want to come off as a jerk should score some points... at least in my book!

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 07:10 AM
Dana Carvey..

"Choppin' Broccoli"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=onZZYTq-CAY

This still cracks me up.

 

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Extreme Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 08:32 AM
This is making me cry it so funny! I can't stop giggling.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 08:36 AM
Just be glad its nt some stinky dried fish that has been fried. I made the mistake of gobbling down a bowl of it not to insult somebody, they thought I liked it so much they brought me another bowl with twice as much in it.
Kind of made the rest of the meal not as appetizing.

 

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True Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 08:51 AM
Donna's sister is married to a Korean/American guy. His mom is a real-life "off-the-boat" Korean.

Recently, they had a lot of her family over from Korea.

We went over for a great big outdoor Korean barbecue. All of the food was just outstanding! Some of the most delicious stuff I've ever eaten.

Now, most of these folks speak no English . At all.

I was standing by the grill with several of the gentlemen who were grilling cloves of garlic. One of them pulled a clove off of the grill and handed it to me. I didn't really know what to do, so after inspecting it for a couple of seconds, I put it in my mouth and ate it.

The grilled garlic was tasty! It even had a little "fire " to it.

Well, this same man looked at me kind of funny. He pulled another clove off the fire and handed it to me. I ate that one, too.

The guy kind of disappeared for a moment, then returned with 4 or 5 other non-English speaking Koreans. He handed me another clove. Again, not wanting to appear ungrateful - I ate that one.

Now, all of these guys start pulling garlic off the grill and handing it to me. I am starting to sense that something just might not be correct here.

After consuming approximately 75 of these little garlic cloves, Donna's brother-in-law wades into the crowd and pulls me away. Through his mother's interpretation, I find that I am some sort of American super-human garlic eater. These guys had just never seen anybody that could swallow these things whole and pure. Turns out, I wasn't supposed to actually eat the first one.

For about about a week after this barbecue ... I couldn't sneak up on a septic tank truck if I tried.

 

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Zen Peach



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  posted on 12/16/2009 at 09:03 AM
I like my broccoli steamed, please. With or without cheese sause!

 

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